Showing posts with label the knitting gods are angry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the knitting gods are angry. Show all posts

Sunday, April 5, 2009

it's that time again...

...when I realize "gee, haven't posted anything in a long while, maybe I should." Because, ya know, the whole point of a blog is to update it? And so far I'm pretty much failing at that.

So. Knitting.

The Stripey Sweater of Intimidation is going. The first sleeve has given me very little trouble, until I reached the end of the armhole shaping instructions and still had twice as many stitches as I should have. After puzzling over it and adding up how many stitches I've got and checking several times for errata, I've just kept decreasing and it seems to have come out more or less the right shape and length. I'm very tired of knitting this thing. It's been one problem after another for me, and I'm ready to have done with it.

I also blame the Stripey Sweater of Intimidation for me buying more yarn even though I shouldn't have. See, even though I obsessively double-checked my yarn amounts when ordering, I still didn't order enough. So I had to order an extra skein. I actually ordered two extra skeins, because with my luck I still won't have figured it correctly and I've got plans for a pair of fingerless gloves. Well, two pairs. And this yarn can go to one of those. And you can't just place an order for two skeins, so I also threw in two pairs of socks' worth of sock yarn. And a cable needle. I know, I fail.

While The Sweater was in time-out, I started another pair of socks. Yep, rather than knitting up the companion to one of the several orphans I've got lying about. I know, I know. I'm using Cascade Fixation. The yarn looked bright and cheerful online, then when I actually received it the skeins looked like garish clownbarf. Then when I started knitting the cuff the colors looked bright and cheerful again. The sky-blue and lilac blended perfectly with the yellow and orangey-red. In a fit of helpless optimism, I named them my Tequila Sunrise Socks. And they were pretty.

Until I hit the leg. Then the colors started doing odd things. They began pooling funny. And unattractively.



And I just let them, because, hell, I don't care anymore. Let them pool. As long as the stitch count is right and the pattern isn't trying to make me scream in frustration, I'm good. Of course, they couldn't pool consistently, oh no, that'd be too much to ask for. Now that I'm on the foot of the sock, they've settled into making stripes. STRIPES. Still, as long as the pattern is correct, I really don't care.

All of my knitting hates me. I have begun to accept this.

And following that line of thought, I'm going to share a conversation I just had with my darling fiance.

Me: I've finally found a pattern for that Araucania Ruca I've had for so long! It took me forever but I've finally found the perfect one, and now I want to cast on!

Him: Shouldn't you finish one of your other projects first?

Me: Yeah, maybe, but I want to make this.

Him: You know how it'll go. By the time you finall finish it you'll be so pissed at it you won't want to wear it.

Me: What?

Him: It happens every time. You'll screw up the pattern, swear a lot, throw it in the time-out corner for a month, rip and reknit a dozen times, and just get angry about the whole thing.


As much as I hate to admit, he really does have a point. Although he was wrong about one thing - it's a time-out basket not a time-out corner.

So, Ruca, you'll just have to wait your turn to drive me round the bend. That is, if there's anything left of my sanity by the time I finish this soul-sucking sanity-eating monster that's masquerading as a sweater...

Thursday, March 19, 2009

somehow, i have angered the knitting gods

I swear. I don't know what I've done to piss them off, or why the hell I deserve such punishment, but the knitting gods are smiting me with every possible bit of bad luck they can manage. Let's take a look at my Stripy Sweater of Intimidation!

--The ribbing is 24 rows, 12 in color A and 12 in color B. I knit 12 in color A and 14 in color B. Not a terribly big deal, and I'm replicating that error on all the pieces. Kind of annoying that I cannot frigging count.

--I then realized that the stripes are supposed to be 20 rows wide. I'm knitting them 24 rows wide. Still not a big deal, as I'm just knitting them all 24 now. So my stripes are slightly wider. So what. Still pretty annoying that I cannot frigging count.

--Halfway through the back I realized that I cast on four stitches too few. DESPITE counting and re-counting, and counting again obsessively. I still fucked up, and not by just a stitch or two. By FOUR. How the hell did I miss FOUR stitches??? My inability to count is getting somewhat ridiculous.

--Finished the back, moved on to the left front. I apparently store my brain in my butt when I'm knitting, because I just kept knitting along after finishing the increases, in a happy little fog. Snapped out of it to realize that I've knitted two and a half stripes past where I should have started the armhole shaping. This is what happens when I knit and . . . well, when I just knit, sadly.

--Knit the right front. Realized when I was about to bind off that instead of knitting the right front, I've actually been knitting another LEFT front. Much screaming and swearing occurred, and there may or may not have been a childish temper-tantrum followed by me storming off to the kitchen for a fortifying drink of the alcoholic variety to steel myself to rip back to the armhole.

I'm at somewhat of a loss for how else exactly I can screw this thing up. But I'm sure there's a way.

Last night I just cast on for the first sleeve. Stay tuned for further adventures.